Month: October 2015

I know someone who is the greatest guy a friend could ask for. He’s likeable, has a big heart and always means well, but whenever the discussion exits the realm of small talk and into that of heavy duty conversation, he’s a mess.

Poor guy. His heart is in the right place, his content is interesting, but by the end of any conversation, after droning on like a textbook for the better part of ten minutes, he is usually, unbeknownst to him, the only one in the room left caring.

He just can’t hear the crickets.

I sat in an interview last year with an ambitious young gentleman looking for an IT position. He was asked to tell us about himself, and he did. A LOT. A lot more than we cared to hear or needed to know. Not just about his previous work experience, but his home, his girlfriend, his mother and there may have been something in there about a dog if memory serves correctly.

He gave us so much information that the time it took him to answer one question was the same time it took the Hiring Manager to log into the company’s on-line ticketing system, close three tickets and respond to two e mails while sitting at his desk, not really listening to any more this gentleman had to say.

God bless his soul but he just couldn’t, for the life of him, hear the crickets.

Crickets, I’m sure many will know, are those insects that, in the dead of night, when the rustle and bustle of everyday living has been put to bed, you will hear chirping.

When silence falls and no one is left to care, the only sound left will be the crickets.

Learning to hear the crickets is a simple concept and what they have to say is valuable. In fact it’s the most standard thing one can learn in the art of making every day conversation.

And yet so many people are so wrapped up inside their head, world, or own posterior that they can’t hear the crickets when they sound. They are so concious of themselves that they forget to consider their audience and run the risk of losing them altogether.

So how does one go about Learning to Hear the Crickets?

Simple:

Pay Attention

Next time you go to a party, out for a drink or to any sort of social gathering, when the setting is right, tell your favourite joke:
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Me: Knock, Knock.

You: Who’s there?

Me: World’s most interrupting dog.

You: World’s most interrupting…

So, what happened? Pay attention to the response. If people laughed, congratulations, you just commanded the attention of a room. Good job. Give yourself a pat on the back and keep the ball rolling with another.

However, maybe no one laughed. Maybe a few people turned and walked away. Maybe what you said just wasn’t funny enough to capture the imagination of the group.

If all you heard in response were crickets, they are telling you that it is time to start working on new material.

The principal remains the same in the interview setting. Pay attention. Does the interviewer seem to be relating to what you are saying? Do they nod their head in recognition to your answers? Do they keep the conversation going by continually asking more about yourself and your background?

If so, you’ve captivated/intrigued/engaged your audience. This is your moment in the spotlight. Enjoy it.

If the interviewer is not engaging in eye contact, if they stop taking notes/typing as you speak, or if they get on their computer, then the crickets should be telling you something.

They are trying to tell you to wrap it up and get on with yourself. Otherwise you are going to lose this job.

After all, this is the person who is going to need to work with you for a minimum of forty hours a week. If they aren’t interested in you after fifteen, why would they want to be around for more than that?

Luckily the crickets are there to let you know when this is happening. All you need to do is listen.