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I can’t wait to read that pile of Information Architect resumes that came in over the weekend…
Said no Recruiter in the history of ever.
Why?
Because NOBODY LIKES TO READ.
If someone’s job in the agency is to do nothing but read resumes, you can pretty much guarantee that they’re the most junior person on site. In fact there’s only one person in the office getting paid worse than the resume reader.
Because nobody likes to read.
I don’t like to read. HR doesn’t like to read. The Hiring Manager doesn’t like to read.
Which means your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write a resume that makes several people who don’t like to read, want to read it. Got it? Good luck.
When I read resumes I’m doing so to figure out who I want to call. I have a stack of 50 for one job. Ideally I want 3 to put forward to the client.
To find those 3 I’ll have to call at least 10.
During my first skim of the pile I’m looking at the basics. Do you live within range of the position? Do you have the minimum experience the job description requires? Are there any careless mistakes? Etc.
At this point, I’m looking for a reason to help the environment.
Next up I want to find the one’s I’m seriously going to consider reading. Those will include people with industry experience, anyone with “nice-to-haves,” those with similar past job titles or those wild cards that don’t fit the bill 100% but maybe if you get them on the phone they’ll tell you something interesting. If you have those things, make sure they are front and centre.
We’re down to about fifteen. I’ve e mailed the others to let them know that I’ll keep them in mind for anything else that they might be good for.
Now, to read a bit more in depth. If I’m looking for a System Administrator and your job title has been System Administrator for the past five positions, that sounded promising. But titles can be misleading and in the majority of cases are totally irrelevant. So I want to know exactly what you were doing in as few words as possible.
Having the correct Buzz Words that let me know you know something about what the job deception is asking for is important in making it this far.
But I also want to know: Do you sound like you know what you’re talking about? Did you in some way make a significant impact on something? Did you win an award? Do you have something that makes you look better than everyone else? And maybe most importantly, do you make a compelling case for how awesome you are?
And now we’re down to 10. Congratulations. You’re one of the lucky winners who are getting a call to talk about this job.
Don’t break the bank celebrating yet, though. The finish line is still a long way away.
There is no greater indicator of nobody knowing anything than the Resume.
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Whole books have been written on the subject. Entire classes are dedicated to it. And yet nobody has one golden secret for writing the perfect resume. It just doesn’t exist. Everyone has an opinion and none of them are guaranteed to produce right or wrong results. It’s a tough racket this resume writing.
Just know this:
There’s one person that you can always guarantee to please with your resume. It’s not me. And it’s not the hiring manager of the job you’re applying to. It’s YOU! A resume is a reflection of YOU. It’s a declaration of the value of YOU as a professional. If YOU can read what YOU’ve written and know that it makes YOU sound as awesome as YOU are, good job. YOU’ve written a resume.
The biggest problem I see with most resumes is that people don’t give themselves enough credit. They’re scared to toot their own horn. Modesty is no good in the resume business. Resume writing is like a competitive sport where you never see your competition. All you know is that you have a 1 in 100 shot of getting the job and if you don’t sell yourself like you’re the best that’s ever been, at least one of the other 99 probably will. In the job race there are only two places: first and everything else.
So before writing another word, stop and ask yourself: How Awesome Am I?
Did you jump to your feet and declare, I AM F%#$*&G AWESOME?
Ya? Good. You’re on your way to writing a great resume.
The vast majority though probably responded something more like this:
Because you haven’t given it much thought. No wonder you’re having trouble writing a resume. You don’t even know how awesome you are. Take some time to think about it. I’d even encourage you to write an “Awesome List”; a list of all the things you’ve done that make you awesome.
Did you win a prestigious award? Did you lead a team to the brink of destruction and back? Did you save the office from alien invasion? Did you make a difference? If you’ve done any of these things, or many, many others, then congratulations. You’re awesome.
Those are the things you want to base your resume around. These are the things that are going to get you through the door. When I read your resume you want me to think: This guy sounds awesome. I’m going to make a point of calling him. Not: This guy sounds exactly the same as the last 28 people who applied.
Because guess what? I didn’t call them and I’m probably not going to call you either. If I need to get you on the phone for you to explain to me why you’re awesome, you’re probably not awesome enough. Thanks anyway.
Once you have your list written we’ll pick up tomorrow to discuss how to start putting your awesomeness on paper.
So you’ve sat by the phone, day in and day out, for the past three weeks waiting for it to ring.
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Suddenly it does.
*Ring**Ring* William: Hello? Mike: Hey, is this William? William: Yes. Who’s this. Mike: Hey William it’s Mike from XYZ Recruiting. Listen, came across your profile on LinkedIn and wanted to reach out to see if you’re on the job market? William: Do you have a job for me? Mike: I’d love to have you come into the office so we can go over your skills and background in more detail and see if we can find something for you. William: Of course. Let me know when is good for you and I’ll be there. Mike: Great William, I’ll e mail you the details. *Click*
Although all I offer William is the chance to tell me about himself, in his elation this is probably closer to what he heard:
Mike: Hey William. I’d love to have you come into the office so we can discuss that job I want to give you.
Let’s make this perfectly clear. An interview with a Recruiter is NOT a job interview. It’s an invitation for you to tell me about yourself. It’s your chance to instill in me the confidence I need to put you forward to my client. It’s your chance to show me that you’re more of this:
And less of this:
It is by no means an indication that you will get a job. It isn’t even an indication that you’ll get put forward for a job. In some cases the Recruiter may not even have a job in mind when they call you into the office, but more on that later.
Recruiters have a minimum number of people they need to interview each week regardless of whether they have ten open job orders to fill or none. If they don’t do enough, they get fired. That’s how it works.
In my opinion, you should book as many interviews with Recruiters as you can afford to. Think about it. The more people you see, the more people will know you. The more people that know you, the more people that will talk about you and the more people that talk about you, the more chance that the right person is going to hear about you. If you’re on the job market, you want as many people talking about it as possible.
Plus, a face in an office will always been more memorable than a voice on a phone. Remember, memorable is what you want. If I’m seeing five to ten new people a week, plus taking phone calls every day, that’s a lot of names to potentially fall to the wayside. The people I’ll stay in touch with are the ones that stood out above the pack. The ones that are serious about finding a job. The ones that made me see dollar signs. Not the ones who couldn’t be bothered to come in.
It’s going to take some time and effort on your part. There’s a lot of Recruiters out there and some are going to waste your time. There’s nothing you can do about that. All you can do is try to be as memorable as possible. If you don’t risk seeing a couple of bad Recruiters, you’re never going to find the ones that are there to actually help you.
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Have been for the past three and a half years. But with that I’m also a Salesman, a Therapist, a Career Coach, a Guidance Counsellor, a Social Worker, a Psychologist, a Program Manager, a Babysitter, and an Administrative Assistant. Just to name a few.
It also means that I not only have to know my business, but you know all those big shiny companies I try my very best to get you working for?
I need to know them inside and out too. And they can get tricky.
I need to know the HR department and their processes.
I need to know Procurement and their processes.
I need to know the VMS Program Manager and their processes.
And I need to know the individual department Managers, Senior Managers, Directors, AVPs and VPs of each department.
Not all of these people like hearing from me and on busy days. Some think I’m a bother. But how else are they going to know to turn to me the next time they need someone like you?
That’s a lot someone needs to know just to help you get a job. It can be exhausting
I’m happy to say that I don’t know anything about it.
Famous screenwriter William Goldman (Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, The Princess Bride) has a saying about Hollywood: “Nobody knows anything.” It’s the same in the Recruitment business.
The market is crowded with quack salesmen and career consultants promising the golden secrets to getting you that dream job. Good luck. Nobody knows anything.
Once a not particularly promising candidate told me that he sought assistance with writing his resume. “Tough break,” I thought. “This guy’s been duped.” Horror passed my face as he named the prestigious college that had helped.
Nobody knows anything.
How was I supposed to know that my hiring manager thinks that cover letters ending in “Yours Truly” are too personal and prefers “Sincerely,” instead? Doesn’t it matter that she’s prefect for the job?
Nobody knows anything.
No one can guarantee that the two and a half hours you spent personalizing your cover letter will land you the interview. Maybe they don’t like your font. Maybe they don’t like your layout. Maybe they don’t like your page breaks. Maybe they just didn’t like anything that day.
You can spend a whole life thinking about what you should-a, could-a, would-a done, if only you’d known. Don’t bother. Nobody knows anything.
The good news is, if you blow an opportunity, there’s a hundred more staring you in the face. They’re not all going to be perfect and they can be hard to find. Don’t give up. If you want them,
you’ll do it. I’m here to help. That’s what I do.
My words are not concrete. Nobody knows anything. What they are is funny, insightful, inspired, encouraging and hopefully helpful.
